One of the highlights of this years AEE/AVN show was running into Cytherea. We first met Cytherea at an Industry Event, and followed her career, thru her “non” exclusive contract with Cherry Boxx, winning Best Starlet to being one of the best squirters ever in the industry. We sat down the day after the show to reflect on her journey thus far, what’s next and where she hopes to take her career. Be sure to follow her on X or Twitter: @RealCytherea, follow her Loyalfans: loyalfans.com/Cytherea, her amazon wishlist is, https://amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2MSI4TI9319SN?ref_=wl_share and she can be reached direct at: [email protected]
SW: Sherman Way
C: Cytherea
Editor: Ralph Jr. Greco
SW: It’s the first time we’ve seen you in a couple of years.
C: Yeah.
SW: What’s been going on with you since?
C: I don’t know, I’ve had a lot of great times. I’ve had a lot of tragic times, but I’m here still today, I just notice as I get older I’m getting more hornier.
SW: You’ve been signing the last three days at the show?
P: Yeah, I was. I was signing at Loyal Fans.
SW: What was it like for you?
C: It was crazy. It’s never going to be like when I used to sign, like back in the day. I saw a lot of old faces. I saw a lot of new faces.
SW: Was there some reason you decided to come back now or was this a perfect time in your life?
C: I got back in 2010. And the only reason I got back in is because I honestly didn’t think I was ever going to get back in it. After having kids, I just… I didn’t have the same body, whatever. I was a mom. But then my fans found me and they begged me to come back.
C: Thank you. Honestly, , when I got back in, it was, it was so unfamiliar, if I can guess, because when I was in, we were like a tight knit family. We partied together, we did drugs together, we did everything together. Like it was crazy. And we always had each other’s back. And then when I got out, I don’t know what happened.
But I feel like, now like a trendy thing. I feel like it’s, you know what I mean? But as long as the girls are doing it for the right reasons because they want to, then I’m all for it. You know, I love it when I hear a girl come up to me, oh my God, you were the first porn I watched. You’re the reason why I got in. Like, oh wow, well, it’s good. I’m glad, good.
SW: Did your perspective on sex change from becoming a mom?
C: No, not really. before having kids, I walked around with like assless like pants and my, I wouldn’t care what was going around, but now it’s like walking through the casino floor. I made sure that I had a long trench coat So I had all my body parts covered, I didn’t want to run into a kid or something.
As a woman gets older you get this, sexual peak And I guess I’m going through that sexual peak.
SW: And that peak for you is that thinking about sex more having constantly?
C: I was having sex more after my husband passed away in two-thousand sixteen, a year later. I tried to date and that didn’t work out, it was toxic. I feel like what I did for a living just breaks down the relationship. Then I broke up with that person and then I got in with somebody else and that quickly did not work. Now I’ve just decided to be a mom. If I wanna have sex, just keep it in the industry. If I wanna fuck, I’ll fuck somebody for content or fuck them, you know, whatever it is. Trust me, I would love to have it more. I’d like to have it every night, but it’s not worth it. It’s not worth the heartache. It’s not worth the pain in the ass. Having sex outside the industry, people don’t get tested constantly. So ,it’s a risk to my health. So, and I’m very cautious about that.
SW: You mentioned dating, for sake of discussion, you meet a guy someplace. At what point does…the discussion of your career come up?
C: Oh, I say right in the beginning. I try to scare them away, I guess is what you call it. I just, I feel like if I can get that out of the way and then they can move past that, they can see who I am. Because me being a porn star, it doesn’t defy me. I know there’s a lot how people perceive porn stars. But they ‘re completely wrong. Just like everybody else, every porn star is different in their own personality. I’ve been told a lot that I’m down to earth and really easy to get along with and they’re just amazed on what kind of person I am. So, I like to try to get it out of the way, but sometimes it’s like I even did a dating app once and I put it in there that I am a porn star, but I got just the most crude, crass commentsYeah. So, I just screw dating.
SW: Are they expecting porn sex or are they expecting civilian sex?
C: Honestly, I don’t know what they’re expecting. I’m expecting them to have their A-game. That’s another big thing. I might be attracted to that person and their personality, but them in bed is nothing to be too excited about. It’s hard to find the happy medium where you find somebody that’s amazing in bed that knows how to have sex with you. Everybody’s different, I think I had pretty cupcake kind of sex compared to a lot of what’s out there. I don’t like anything too crazy. I don’t want a dick in my ear or deep-throated where I’m going to throw up. I mean, more power to you. I did recently, realized I really like anal. I know when I was in the industry, I was like, no, it’s not my cup of tea. I didn’t like it. I found that orgasm and now I can’t get enough of it.
SW: Do you think that maybe being a good-looking woman and having the experience you do, more than most of the guys you meet, that you might intimidate them?
C: I don’t know. I’ve been told this a whole bunch. I don’t know what they expect, but they say that I’m extremely tight for somebody that’s been in the industry. I’m like, what is that supposed to mean? I don’t know. What? Are girls are all blown out being in the industry? No, that’s another myth. I mean, a girl is whatever she is down there. I guess I do snap back pretty good, I guess guys in the industry, they are bigger than most average people, but I don’t find that very true. I’ve found some guys that are non-industry that have a very nice cock. But they were a prick too.
SW: For you, assuming somebody’s dating you, what is it that gets you going? Do you like your neck nippled, boobs played with,etc?
C: Stuff like that. Mainly, you gotta win my heart. I can fuck somebody I hate. So, I emotionally can detach my emotions from sex. I notice a lot of people cannot do that, even people in the industry. I remember when I first got in, they were always telling a lot of the women who were dating guys in the industry, and the guys were going to have a scene with me and they were like, you can’t kiss her, that’s just too romantic. I’m like what?
Kissing is kissing. It’s inot romantic until you make it romantic. Like that’s my pain, I love somebody here doesn’t mean I love them the way I fuck them. I just I feel like kissing is something that is part of the foreplay. I thought that was just kind of weird. I don’t know, as long as you’re not lying, I’m good. I hate the dishonesty. I hate the insecurities. I really do.
SW: Then do you prefer making love or fucking?
C: I always said, can we fuck really, really hard? Or wait, make love really, really hard? Making love is how you feel about that person. So, you can fuck really hard like you are two fucking porn stars that are on their A-game. I think sex for me is all the same. The only difference between sex on film and sex in my bed is the fact I don’t have to open up to a fucking camera. So that’s great, you know? But I like having sex… I have sex the same way I do in bed and on film, pretty much.
SW: Then for you as a woman, do you need sex five times a day?
C: I think my pussy would have a strike on that one. She would not agree. But I mean, yeah, that would be great. Sometimes it’s like, when I first hit my sexual peak, it was the more I got it, the more I wanted it. It didn’t cure my craving which was crazy for me. It’s like a toothache, it just doesn’t go away and she just starts throbbing and I can’t think about anything else and it’s like, fuck, man, go away, leave me alone. Then I had to go to a doctor or something and maybe I had something wrong with me.
SW: Do you get turned on from a scent, from a smell, from a thought.
C: Yeah, a thought, maybe a scent,I don’t know, I wish I could explain it. I just, when I see it, I know my body just reacts to it something, a certain thing. I mean, if you’re not like, on the outside, very attractive, but you are on the inside, if I need five minutes with you and then maybe I can, yeah, for sure. The outside of a book is only this, it’s nothing until you can see the insides because you can be like way hot and be ugly inside and it would just make you look ugly. You gotta have a good personality and a good sense of being a person like being patient and caring and understanding and stuff like that.
SW: Did you find that from being in the adult industry? Did you have that idea before?
C: I kind of always had that idea before. I mean, I know my past exes have never really been the greatest lookers. My husband wasn’t the greatest looker, but man, he was an amazing man. He was very understanding. I was pregnant, and it was during my last video, I thought, you know, in the industry. I was having sex with Hammer.. Big black guy. So. I’m getting pounded, I’m doing my scene with him and I’m getting pounded away and I’m squirting like crazy and I’m, and one of the film guys I think his name was Dominic too. I was, I had it all over his camera and then the lights were kind of sparking and he had to call cut and I remember looking over and my husband was on set. And I remember looking over and he had a smile that a surgeon could not remove. He was just so proud of me and so happy. I just thought to myself, yep, this is the guy. I mean, what guy do you know that can let his pregnant wife being pounded away by some big black guy and be so happy and in love with that person? To me, you can call that whatever you want. I think that is that called unconditional love. And that’s it. I don’t think a lot of people in this world have ever or will experience unconditional love, but I got to. I guess at my age, I miss the emotional connection. You know what I mean? Not physical, but emotional too. Just somebody I can talk to, invent to, and you know, bounce ideas off.
SW: You are known as one of the best “squirters”? I guess that’s the way to say it.
C: I was. I know there was many before me and I know there were other girls that squirted. I’ve worked with a lot of the girls in the industry that were squirters in my time, but if anything, I would have to be proud of the fact of the kind of impact I made with squirting scenes. I literally turned the industry from anal to squirting. Like that’s unheard of. When the industry has their mind set that the customers or the fans want anal, that’s what they’re gonna give them. I was even told when I first got in that if I don’t do anal, then you can just, you might as well think about another career. And until I get kicked out or I’m not wanted. But mainly, what I’m happy and proud about is how many marriages I’ve saved and how many women I’ve made feel comfortable in their skin for squirting. Because there’s so many times where I’ve been told, I was so embarrassed, he made me feel like shit and I squirted and he said I pissed all over him, and how many men I’m educating to let them know that that’s not pissing, and even if it is, as long as you’re having fun and you’re having good orgasms, that to me, is all that matters. All I know is I sit on the toilet and I go pee, and when I’m in bed and I have a cock inside me or stimulation in that area, I get extremely wet.
SW: How did you learn you could squirt and all that?
C: Okay, so I had a girlfriend, a real girlfriend way back in the day, and she told me, for one, how to go get waxed, and then she told me I ate pussy horrible. I mean, I never knew how, I guess. I mean, it’s something you have to be, I guess, taught. I mean, and women are hard. So she told me she had a friend, an older male, that he eats wonderful pussy and he’s going to teach you. So, we all got to his house, we started having threesomes. She had to leave for work and we would continue fucking and next thing I know, I got really, really wet down there and I thought I pissed on him. I was so embarrassed because he was way older and I was younger and I just thought, oh my God, it’s just so embarrassing. He’s like, oh my God, that’s so hot, you squirted. I guess I’ve been doing it since like eighteen, nineteen maybe. And then I remember going into industry for the first time, I did it with, I can’t remember what company, it was like a new company, like Nectar or something. They just started an opening production and I squirted on set and I remember them taking, they called break and they took like a five or ten-minute break just to talk about my orgasm. I thought that was kind of crazy and then I realized that maybe I have something unique. I mean, it’s not something you talk to your mom or your sister about, like it’s kind of weird conversations and I never really talked to my girlfriends about it. I just thought that it was a thing that women do.
Apparently, not every woman can. I’ve learned that a lot of women haven’t even had an orgasm. Never had an orgasm. That’s just bananas to me. Like, what? I mean, I can’t even wrap my head around that. How could you not have an orgasm? It’s the best medicine out there. If you guys remember, plus one or Brian. Okay, so, I just met him in Las Vegas and he’s like, I had never seen the ocean before. So he’s like, you wanna come to California with me? I’m like, fuck yeah. So I went and saw the ocean for the first time. Breathtaking, absolutely breathtaking. But we were living in San Diego right off the beach and I was bored. He was at work all day, so I was bored and I started a Yahoo group where I was like smoking out of a bong and taking naked pictures and I had somebody contact me and ask me if I’d like to be in the porn industry. So, we met up with them they told me a little bit about it, and they said well before you make your decision why don’t you go to and industry event. It was in a bowling alley. I walked through one set of double doors, and then I went through another set of double doors and I walk in and there’s just naked everywhere. People wearing bowling shoes and just bowling and there’s like people with cameras everywhere and just doing all kinds of things. I’m like, whoa, and then everybody’s like, who are you? What’s your name? I’m like, I don’t even know because I didn’t have a name at the time. Hadn’t even done my first scene. I was just seeing if it was something I would like to do. And I remember they had me go up there and bowl and I actually got a strike. But, then right before I was leaving, I was in the lockers area and Belladonna came up to me and slammed me against the lockers and choked me out and then licked me and made out with me and then walked away. I was like, okay, sign me up. I’m down. I’m totally down. I remember just being really into that.
I was like, who’s this chick? I’ve never had anyone come up to me like that. You know the funny story is, is me and Bella Donna, like literally, I was like maybe two or three years, two or three years behind her, she lived right up the street from me, went to the same schools, everything. I was like, what? What a trip! Yeah, so me and Bella Donna have a lot in common. Yeah, that’s crazy. After that, my plus one, or Brian, took me to a swinger’s club for the first time. I remember calling my mom and like, mom, I’m going to a swingers club where couples actually exchange having sex with each other and I’m getting body paint on me right now. I was just so excited. I’ve never experienced anything like that. I mean, I come from Utah. Pretty white picket fence kind of life. I was very sheltered and so I was just so excited about this, going to this sex thing. Once I went there, I just loved it. I loved it. I loved the tension. I loved the sex. I loved the vibe. I loved everything about it. So I just, I took to the sex industry very easily. So, but yeah, the rest is kind of history. I did my first movie, they handed me an enema and a douche and I had not a fucking clue what to do with it. Because I’ve never douched in my life, and I’ve never done an enema. I didn’t even know really there was such a thing as anal sex, to be honest with you. I just was very naive. So I was like, I don’t really know what to do with this stuff. He’s like, well, this one’s for your vagina and then this is for your butt. I said okay. I didn’t use the enema one because, thank God I didn’t, because he never told me to dump out this water and put water in there. That would have been horrible. But I did it, I remember him trying to stick it up my butt and I was like, uh-uh, uh-uh. You could see me in the video. I don’t know how he edited it like that, but I was like, no, I’m not, that’s not. But it was really weird to do a scene and have a camera there, like right in front of your face while you’re having sex. It was definitely something you had to get used to, yeah. I don’t know. I loved the industry. I loved it. When I found out you can win awards for it, I was like, what? Win awards? Like, what kind? I looked it up and I was like, no way. I’m like, what’s the most prestigious award you can win? What’s the hardest award you can get? And they told me, best new starlet. I said, well then, bitch, I’m getting it. I was not even two weeks into the industry. And if anybody interviewed me, they’re asking me questions. I would say, yep, I want to win best new starlet. That’s what I want. And I won that bitch. I couldn’t believe that. Because I was against Tegan Presley. And Tegan Presley was hot shit back in the day. It was good competition. I was really happy that I was against her and not anybody else that wasn’t. You know what I mean? It makes the award so much more valuable for me, I guess. And my mom was there.And what’s his name, Howard Stern started making fun of me for thanking my mom. It wasn’t like I got best anal or best blow job. I got best new starlet, which means all-around good. I mean, I wouldn’t be the person I am without my parents raising me. So I thank my mom, she was there. She was very supportive. It was awesome.
SW: Do you feel the eyes upon you does it turn you on?
C: Yes, it’s something about it that is a high that you can’t get out of any other situation although it’s weird too, because I get panic attacks with a lot of people around. I don’t like that kind lot of tension on me. So it’s like a love-hate relationship
SW: You do your first movie. I’m guessing it goes well. Do you immediately decide at that point to continue shootingor not?
C: No, man, it was full fucking. It was a zero to 120 and like just real quick. I mean, I was just I was doing two scenes a day. Just every day it was it was crazy I had an agency, the first one that signed me up and then I dropped them, I don’t know how, but then I started working exclusively with Harry Weiss. I feel like he was good, he was really good. I needed that kind of agent with me to be patient and to be there on top of my shit.
SW: Yeah, for sure. To get in, at what point does this become a career?
C: Harry always made sure I treated it as a career, but I was always just having fun. I was just being me. Just being my bubbly, fucking spastic self, you know, just loving sex and just doing my thing. The only time it wasn’t fun is when Brian became very abusive and I started doing, I mean, yeah, I was doing a lot of drugs. I wasn’t doing anything like needles or heroin or anything, but that doesn’t make it any better or worse or whatever, but he just he became very toxic, very toxic, and I think that wore down on me more than anything. I trusted him so much. I thought that he was my fiance. I was going to marry him and all that. I trusted him. It broke me down quite a bit, and it took a lot of my soul away from me. So, he was just, he’s a soul sucker. He’s the genuine definition of suitcase pimp. I swear to God, there were times where he was supposed to be in charge of me and I was like well don’t I have a shoot tomorrow or something? He’s like oh no no. And the next thing I know I’ve been partying all night, I haven’t gotten to sleep and he’s like, oh yeah you need to get ready, you have a shoot. I’m like what? I would never party if I knew I had a shoot the next day. And that started becoming to the point where I had to do it because we had to survive. I was young and dumb, and I trusted the fact that he was taking care of things. I was giving him all the money and he was supposed to be paying everything and he wasn’t. He told me I had a tax lawyer never once, and I never once asked to see this tax lawyer paperwork, nothing because I was dumb. I was dumb and I found out there was no tax lawyer. There was no nothing, the worst point was where we got kicked out of our house and we were sitting on the streets with all my dogs. I mean that was scary. Then we went and started staying with some friends and this and that. That’s when he really started getting very abusive. One day I finally, I left him. It was really, really scary. He’s held a knife to my throat, poured gasoline on my head. He’s hit me so hard where I couldn’t move. I was like almost paralyzed. After him holding the knife to my throat, I packed up my shit as much as I could and I left, left everything behind, I left him behind. Then he found out where I was living, he broke into my house a couple times, and finally just stopped, thank God. That’s when I met Tim, and I decided to start feature dancing and just kind of get a break from the industry because I got really skinny. So I did and I’m glad I did. I met Tim, I got clean. I getting clean because the drugs weren’t appealing to me anymore. When I started feature dancing, he was my roadie. Then I found out I was pregnant and fell in love with him. And I decided to just say, screw it. I decided to have the baby and I’m glad I did.
SW: Do you remember any surreal moments, when you’re kind of like, all this crazy stuff is happening, and you were like, what the hell is going on?
C: Yeah, there was, man he made my life so difficult. There was just a lot of crazy shit. I remember when my squirting stuff became kind of a big deal and it was a lot of talk around it and then there was so many people that were just being haters and they’re like, oh that’s piss, she’s pissing, she’s pissing. I just remember feeling like there was there was one girl that I guess she put a line on the back of the toilet and try to blame It was on me and I’m like for one, if it was doing that drug, there would be no lines on the back of the toilet. I’d be doing it. I was trying to quit that, so I would leave the doors open and just pee and poop or whatever I needed to do so that there was no question whatsoever that I was getting clean. Because I mean I know it’s hard to probably believe I didn’t deal with a lot of people that had a lot of addictions at that time, so I didn’t understand it, but I just, I was done. I mean when I’m done with something I’m done. That’s it. I don’t know, it’s just the industry can get pretty chaotic and there could be a lot of haters when you start getting up on the top and they will try to do anything to bring you down, which I find that that’s in any industry that you’re in. Really, you don’t have to be in the porn industry or anything else. If you’re getting there on the top, there’s always going to be haters. There’s always going to be somebody that’s not going to be happy for you. So, it is what it is. I try to do the best I can with handling and coping with life’s trying to shove a mandigo dick up your ass with no lube.
SW: You have this goal to win an award, and then you do win. What’s the first thing that hits your mind?
C: Oh Jesus, I won. I figured I was up for a nomination but I didn’t think I was going to win, especially being against Tegan Presley. I did not think I was gonna win. When it was up for them to announce it, my mom and I, I was squeezing her hands so tight. And when they said my name, I pissed myself. Thank God I was wearing just gems and not clothing. I mean, literally, I had no clothing. I had all like sparkly gem skirt, underwear, top. I was even asked by the hotel security, if I could wear a jacket to walk through the casino floor. Because I was literally wearing nothing underneath it. I couldn’t believe it. I was shaking so bad. The good thing is, the lights blind you so you can’t see everybody, but everybody is staring at you and you’re like, I didn’t know what to say. I was so nervous. I don’t do well with public speeches. I’m not built for that, I guess. It was so surreal. I couldn’t believe it. I just felt like all my hard work and everything of the blood, the sweat, the everything I worked so hard for came to fruition and it was awarded and that was amazing. I mean, as much as Tegan Presley worked her ass off and she was awesome talent, so did I. I really did.
SW: Do you feel that was the night that you became established in the industry?
C: Honestly, I know that you’re always fighting. There’s always another girl that does something better than you, you know what I mean? There’s always another girl that might be prettier in other aspects or they might, depending on who’s looking at that person, might find them more prettier or me more prettier. It doesn’t matter, but I feel like I made a dent into the industry, not just with my fans, but with the industry, which is the hardest part to win the people in the industry’s hearts over. If you’re not working, then you’re not shooting, then people are not knowing you’re out there. I felt like when I was, I don’t know how to put it. When I finally started going to parties and stuff like that, everybody in the industry that was anybody was coming to my parties, which were legendary, they were amazing, that’s when I feel like I was really making a dent into the industry and I was coming on up. You know what I mean? Because your first scene, you got paid like $1,300, and then after that was like seven or eight hundred. Then as I was getting paid more and more, I felt like I was really earning my way up. So that’s when you know. Honestly, with my fans, I didn’t really feel like there was a moment in my career where I was like, man, the only thing I’ve ever done in my life was spread my legs and make videos, whoopie fucking do. I mean, what have I ever done in this world to make a difference or something? If I died right now, how would people remember me? Then when I went on tour, I started feature dancing, I realized that I have helped so many people in so many crazy ways. I had one guy that told me that he had an accident where he was paralyzed from the waist down. But he was getting married and his friends got together and they got enough cash to bring me over there to spend the night or whatever with him. I don’t know what it was really, but just to kind of hang out with him. I was the reason why he started walking again, he was walking. He was fine. He was okay. He dedicated his, even his wife knew about this, he dedicated his fact that him walking again was because of me. And I’m like, okay, why do I think you need to give yourself more credit? I really, but I learned that it’s whatever gives a person motivation and the passion to do it. Whatever it takes, but there’s so many couples that made posters, t-shirts, women are just crying and saying thank you so much for just giving me the confidence and it just made such a difference in my life.” I’m such more such a more happy and confident person and our marriage was going on the shits, we were doing everything we could do, from marriage counseling and everything and you just you put the new zest in our relationship.” So after hearing that, I really felt good about myself and what I’ve done in the world. I mean that. I finally realized that, not just in the industry. I felt like I was making a difference, but a lot of people in the industry are fake. They’re kind of like: “I love you so much” and the next day like, hi who are you? You know like type of thing. It’s not genuine, but my fans, man, I really had to say they’re amazing. They’re absolutely amazing. There’s so many options and choices they could make and go with. Why would they be such a fanatic of my shit?, I don’t know what it is, and I’m not gonna try to overthink it, but I’m happy. I’m have really loyal, loyal fans, I would have to say. And it’s an amazing feeling, so anyways. You know, somebody asked me, do you regret it? No, there’s nothing in my life I regret. Everything I’ve been through, it’s made me who I am now, today. So, no, I will never regret it.
SW: And then when you become pregnant, is that what takes you out of the business?
C: When I started feature dancing, my roadie and I, we were obviously having sex, but I found out one time I was out of town, he was back at home for this one, and I called him up, because I was feeling funny, and I called him up and told him I was pregnant. And in that moment, I had a choice to either keep it or not keep it. And I don’t know, something inside me just said to keep it. Honestly, if you had asked me, two or three years prior to that, if I’d ever be a mom, I’d laugh at you. Because I just felt like I wasn’t even responsible enough for myself. You know what I mean? Like, besides the fact that I had to raise my brother and sister when my mom and dad got divorced, and I swear to God, up and down, I would never have kids. Fuck kids, I would say. I would never want kids. I just, I didn’t. I figured if my brother and sister would have some, I would, you know, be auntie, and that’s it. I don’t know what came over me to become a mom, but I did. I mean it’s an amazing journey, it really is. You don’t realize what kind of love you have for a child until you have one, it’s crazy. You want to strangle them and at the same time, you want to love and protect them all at once. So, it’s pretty crazy to feel a human being grown inside you.
It changes you. It really does. I think if anything, it’s taught me a lot of things, becoming a parent.
SW: Clarify some myths for people. Famous Porn star leaves the business, does she go to a retirement home? Like what happens?
C: No, I guess at forty-two, I don’t know. I’ve been doing this for so long, I was thinking about going back to college and working a a nine to five., I wanted to think about going into nursing or something like that, because I love taking care of people, I like making people happy and comfortable. But I didn’t feel like because of my career, I’ve been so successful in it, and so many people know me in it, that no matter how far we’ve come as an industry, we’re never going to be accepted. We’re not, we’re always going to be a taboo. But honestly, I think that’s what keeps the industry alive.There’s a lot of people that are more accepting about it, but in the end, people don’t want to know. People don’t want to be associated with us because we’re bad. We’re evil. So, I don’t get it, but whatever, I do.
SW: But when you initially quit, how long did it take you to get out of the Cytherea character and just go back to…?
C: Good thing is, I’m not too much different. From Cytherea. I’m pretty much kind of the same. There’s the social part of me obviously, it was more of a lesson than anything is learning how to be a responsible adult and knowing because these things don’t come with manuals my TV came with, a bigger manual than these fucking kids I don’t know, you’re raising a human being, this is no joke, so it’s like stressful. It’s not a matter of going in transition from like Cytherea the porn star. It’s just transition to being an irresponsible adult to being a responsible adult. So me doing it on my own, it’s quite interesting at times. And trying to manage what I have left in my career. I guess not what I have left, but what I’m doing with my career right now. It’s just trying to balance everything. Before I was late because I was doing something stupid, irresponsible, painting my nails or getting high or something stupid that I was doing. Now it’s like if I’m late, it’s because something is going on with my kids or something like that.
It’s definitely interesting how to balance everything.
SW: And before you got into business, had you watched adult material?
C: I kinda did, but not really. I wasn’t really into that. I just never really watched it. The only time I would actually really watch porn was when I knew I was working with somebody and I would watch their porn to see what their niche was. I could kind of tell by looking at the woman or the guy, well guys are kind of not easy, I can read them. I like to watch to see what they’re into, what they like or what turns them on. I can get a gist of what kind of person they are. So prior, to that, no, I remember seeing my very first porn when I was younger. I remember going through my dad’s chest thing and I saw what I didn’t know what it was, a double-sided dildo. And then I popped into one of these VHS tapes and watched these two girls fuck each other with a double-sided dildo. Oh my god, I was scarred, I’m still today scarred from that. I had to bleach my hands and everything. I had to put everything back the way it was. I was like, oh my god, I can’t believe I just went in there! Because, you know, kids are nosy. They’re curious. I was just very curious. And I really wish I wasn’t that day.
SW: When you saw the material did the thought cross your mind, “I could do that.”
C: No, never, never. No. I mean, I never put the two together.
SW: Have you ever had an experience with the casting couch?
C: No, I’ve heard myths about that. I thought that was like the whole myth of fluffers and stuff, a lot of people actually really think there’s fluffers on set. Like really? I think the only time they might be fluffers is if there’s a gangbang. But that wasn’t happening on the A-class videos that I was used to doing. I never really got into the Bs and Cs, maybe a couple times with the Bs, but I never did anything like that. I don’t judge anybody for what they do. If they’re loving it, absolutely loving it, they’re not just doing it just to get paid and so they can get their next drug fix, but they’re actually loving getting gang banged and they’re tearing the shit up or whatever, I don’t think there should be any class on that. That’s their happiness and that’s their bubble. That’s cool. But honestly, I would freak the fuck out if I had that many dicks coming at me and wanting to do something with me. I’m kind of a one person at a time or maybe just two, after that, it’s just too much. It’s just way too much.
SW: But you never had a producer say, “Give me a blowjob, I’ll get you more work, a good director.”
C: No, if the director wanted a blowjob and I liked him, I’d just give it to him for free, not because I was trying to get anywhere.
SW: Do you do custom work?
C: Oh yes ,I do.
SW: Craziest request you got for a custom?
C: Bouncing on a ball with a dildo on it but it had to be like a beach ball and that was odd. Another one, they wanted me to see me pee. I’ve had a couple customers wanting me to pee and poop on them. I can’t do that.
SW: Social media handles?
C:I have X or Twitter. It’s the @realcytherea.
SW: Before you got into the sex business, were you very sexually active?
P:. To be honest with you, I really didn’t give a fuck. I am hornier now than I was when I was younger. When I was younger it was not a big deal. If I was going to get laid, I was going to get laid. If I didn’t, oh well, I didn’t really care. I felt like I could go a year without it if I wanted to. It was not that big of a deal for me. I don’t know if it’s because I was in the industry and I was doing so many videos because I noticed like…
My biggest thing was trying to get the guys that were in the industry for a very long time to get them really hot and horny they had to pull out and smack their dick because they’re gonna come before the pop shot, you know, that was awesome for me. That got me excited. I don’t know, I wasn’t that horny. I really wasn’t. I mean you would think I was but I was just always down to fuck obviously and I was, when you’re younger you just got all kinds of energies to do everything and do anything and I was very open-minded and I never judged, so I was willing to try anything once.
Now that I’m older, I’m like, I definitely know exactly what I want and what I don’t want and when I want it.
SW: I’m guessing you lost your virginity in high school. Do you have sex once and then become a nymphomaniac? Or do you wait?
C: I had sex the first time when I was sixteen. I actually waited a little longer than most, I guess. apparently. With a guy that I was absolutely in love with, Chris McCarty. I remember him. Yeah, he was amazing. It hurt a lot. It really did. And then after that, me and him…I don’t even know what happened to him, to be honest with you. I got with my second long-term boyfriend, Eric. And we had sex a lot, of course, and we did it a lot, I only had sex with him. I never cheated. I never really, I never cheated. I’ve never cheated on any of my relationships. When I broke up with him, I had like a three or four month period, where I would always fuck on the first date. To this day, I’ll fuck you on the first date. If I know that if I’m sexually attracted to you and there’s chemistry there, I’ll have sex. I’ve even done anal on my first date. I’m a horny person. That’s why I think I should just keep it in the industry because I know it’s clean. If I become a bar-hopping whore, that’s not really good. So, that’s not, it’s as much as it’d be great and all, but it’s just not safe.
SW: Prior to going all the way the first time, had you done BJ’s, hand jobs, anything?
C: No, you know what’s so funny is, I got off on getting guys really hot and horny and getting it so fucking close to my pussy and then I’d pull away. I would just push it to the max and then, I’m like ‘Eh, Nevermind, okay, I wanna go home.’ I don’t know what was wrong with me. You would never think in a million years, I’d think it would be that way, but no. I just got off on that. I don’t know why. Like just teasing guys. I love teasing them. I was with a girl in junior high, she was fun. The first girl I ever ate out was my best friend, years later after I was in the industry and I had that really big house in Woodland Hills she was actually at one of my parties, and I was “Lindsay?” She’s like, “Oh my God!” It was such a trip to see her in my house and the point of my life I was in, it was a trippy situation.
SW: What is the reality of this business versus what people think it is?
C: If you really consider it, I hear that all the time, “I wanna be in the industry.” You gotta remember how many people you’re affecting. Not just yourself, because if you actually become big, you are ruining yourself from having any other career choices that you decide to have because they’re not going to hire you because if you go ahead and fight it all you want about them judging you. You’re going to have a lot of people that are going to say a lot of bad things about you. You’re going to have a lot of people judge you. You’re also affecting your family. I didn’t realize how much I affected my brother’s life, and his friends, all his friends are like, oh my God, you gotta see this girl, and they pop in a video or DVD and he’s like, oh my god, turn that off, you know what I mean?
SW: Last question, anything you want to say to all of your fans?
C: I love you guys so much. Thank you guys so much for being twenty-one years loyal fans. Really, it says a lot about me and it says a lot about you guys.
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