In a relatively short time, Emma Rose has become one of the hottest stars in the industry. The highly accomplished porn star, content creator, dancer and model began performing in early 2020. Since then, she’s swept all the major award shows,winning Rose won “Best New Face” and “Gender X Model of the Year” at the 2021 Transgender Erotica Awards (TEAs).A short time later she won Best Trans Clip Artist” at the 2021 XBIZ Cam Awards, “Best Hardcore Performer” at the 2022 and 2023 TEAs. Earlier this year, she won AVN Trans Performer of the Year and Fleshbot’s TransPerformer of the Year and Best Hardcore Scene 2023.
Interview: Sherman Way
Editor: Ralph Greco Jr.
Photos: Emma Rose/Adult Time
SW:Sherman Way
ER: Emma Rose
Free Magazine version: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/kwfc053mq64himolxrhzr/emma-rose-web.pdf?rlkey=m7kb4pekw0r0yfgr8oszwvmt8&dl=0
SW: Let’s start with More. How did you get involved in that? How did all that come up for Dorcel?
ER: I’ve worked with Dorcel once before.
I was with Victoria Vox. Ricky Greenwood reached out to me and said. “Hey, I really want to work on this project, I got you approved to be the first trans girl in Dorcel. I was like, “Oh my God, that’s amazing.” Dorcel always has such beautiful productions.
SW: Was it a big production.
ER: Yes, it was one of the biggest sets that I’ve ever been on. There was, I think, forty, fifty extras, because they had a villain nightclub. And I was so happy to work with Kira Nior and Casey Calvert. I fucked in a nightclub before, but I’ve never fucked on a DJ set.
SW: Had you worked with Ricky before?
ER: Yeah. I’ve worked with Ricky a lot. I usually work with Ricky for Transensual.
I think Maybe for Gender X too.
SW: What can you tell people about Ricky as a director?
ER: I love him. Sometimes it’s hard to understand him because of his accent, but he always has an amazing vision for his movies, and they always look so great.
SW: And you worked with April Olson, right? You had a scene together with her in this?
ER: Yes. I worked with April Olson. She took my straight virginity, actually. I had never had a woman, like a biological woman, use a strap on on me. And I did that scene for Jim Powers. And ever since then, I fell in love with her. That’s why she’s called “The Strap Queen.”
SW: That was just you two and the crew? ER: Yeah.
SW: Is it a turn-on for you having people watch you have sex?
ER: Yes. I always tell people that if there was a halftime show of the Super Bowl and I was just in the middle, I could put on a show. I love an audience. It’s kind of different when you’re online. Before I did porn, I was a performer as a stripper. Even before that, I did drag for a minute at the beginning of my transition. Anything with an audience. I love being a showgirl. I love putting on a show and a performance.
SW: You obviously enjoy the financial part of this, but do you do this more for the attention or for the money?
ER: Oh, I can’t choose. Honestly, I feel like I make more money off of OnlyFans than I do out of porn, and I work in porn a lot. But honestly, I just love being in front of the camera. And I think that whenever I just put on a show, I just like watching how happy my fans get. Even when I was stripping, the looks on guys’ faces are just priceless to me.
SW: Being as busy as you are presently, why do you think you’re so popular?
ER: I just think that I just bring a flare in front of the camera, and I just love what I do so much. And I think that I won my AVN award this year because last year, so many directors asked, “Oh, are you available this day?” And I would just move everything, to make it work. My schedule was always hectic. Even this year, it’s been really hectic.
It has a little bit more structure this year because I’ve been going to Montreal and New York a lot and shooting with Trans Angels up there. But I just like being a whore.
SW: Is the performance—how do I put this—about getting attention or is it you trying to make this miraculous, famous, fabulous, beautiful scene every time you shoot?
ER: I want to make a beautiful scene every time whenever I’m in front of a camera, and this is why I prefer shooting porn than OnlyFans, although I do love my OF, but when you’re on set, I just really feel like I’m a rose. And it’s just such a nice experience that I want to put on a hell of a show.
SW: Do you remember the first time a man pulled out his thing in front of you during a show ? Did that freak you out? Did that turn you on?
ER Well, I can tell you I wasn’t scared. I mean I’m always horny, which is kind of weird because after I cut my balls off, I thought that my libido was going to go away. But I feel like I’m even hornier now than I was, not in college; I was twenty, so everyone’s horny. But I feel like I’m hornier now, and I have sex more now than I ever did, even off camera.
SW: Does the arousal for you come from a scent, from a thought, what?
ER: Well, I feel like mostly my mind, but also I’m a smell person for sure. When I’m eating pussy during my scenes, I love when a girl’s getting wet. I love being in the moment and just really soaking in all the smells and the sights.
SW: Everything you said in the last five minutes, you seem like you generally get excited and aroused when this beautiful woman’s vagina is in front of you. Camera or no camera.
ER: Yeah. Yeah. I always think about Kendra Lust, when I think of this kind of stuff. I always say she was my lesbian awakening. I shot with her in 2020. I was always so shy working with or being with a girl. I was with women maybe like three times before that. And it was always just a horrible, horrible experience. I didn’t know what I was doing. And then two of the times before my transition, I was just like, ‘I don’t know what I’m doing.’ So I asked Kendra. I’m like, “Hey, can you teach me how to eat pussy?” And she’s super mommy, she’s so hot. And she taught me. And ever since then, I feel like my confidence just shot up for being with a woman, for eating pussy, for enjoying all that.
I actually think that last year, I’ve worked with more women than men, and then this year, I’ve worked with both. So, it’s just been, I don’t know, but it does feel like it all just exploded for me.
SW: What do you think that was the result of? Do you think it was something specific? Like maybe doing so much trans girl and girl content? What do you think it is?
ER: It’s Everything. Just trans in general. But I am happy to be a pioneer in this new age. I’m so grateful that performers like Foxy, Jesse Dubai and Domino Presley have been able to build a foundation that me and Daisy Taylor, all of us, can really take off from. But I think COVID definitely helped because I feel like people really figured out what they wanted to see. And also, it gave a lot of trans girls way more power to be able to be like, ‘Hey, I want to do this.’ And then I think that in the last year, trans girl porn has increased by seventy-five, and then trans man porn has increased by two hundred percent. I think that everybody’s just really like, ‘Oh, this is actually nice.’ And especially with trans girl and girl, I think that like the new lesbian, girl, girl scene because every girl that I’ve been talking to, says, “Oh, I want to work with you,” or, “I want to work with Ariel DeMirle or other trans girls.” And so I think that in the next couple of years, it’s just going to get more and more and more popular.
SW: You mentioned the superstars who paved the road for you in advance. Now that you’re getting bigger and bigger, do you feel you have almost a sense of obligation to help the next generation?
ER: Absolutely. I remember when Domino Presley—she’s an icon, I loved her even before I started porn—the first time that she asked me for advice on OnlyFans, and I said, “Oh, my God, you’re asking me for advice?” And so it’s kind of crazy thinking that I am an icon and I am a big name because I’m just doing what I love to do. But I’ve been giving so much advice to the new girls and how to build a brand. I have my marketing degree with a concentration of brand management. So the way my mind works is always about the brand and the image and how it looks and how people perceive you.
SW: For branding purposes, do you feel on OnlyFans, and all those portals, do you feel it’s more about personality or people come to see you get boned?
SW: It’s definitely both. But my highest-paying fans that are always there, they just love me for me. I think that you’re competing against millions of other girls out there. So ,it’s like what makes you different. And also, it’s just building those relationships. I’ve had fans on my OnlyFans that I’ve had since twenty twenty. We’ve talked every day for the last three years. I’ve had them longer than my relationships. So, personality plays a big part, and also just really being genuine. I think that the girls who aren’t genuine don’t go far. All of the biggest girls like Angela White, Adriana, all these girls that are on the top are always so nice, so genuine, so helping and nurturing. I think that plays a big role of people just being drawn to you like magnets.
SW: Would it be fair to say you two have the same work ethic? You seem to havea proper way that you deal with people.
ER: I always tell people I base a lot of my career off of Angela White because she did her first boy-girl scene eight years into the industry. And she takes her time. She’s completely hot on camera, but in person and for events, she’s just regal, prestigious, put together. And like every time I go to an award or an event, I’m always just put together because it’s like the glitz and the glamour that comes with the career and the stardom. Just how she does everything is she just takes it so seriously, and that’s what I do. Actually, our podcast is coming out next month for Vice. We’re doing a monthly one hour episode every month. I was so happy when they chose us. And I was like ‘Oh, my God. Angela, I’m so excited.’
SW: But for you, being the biggest porn star, is that being on the cover of a magazine? Is that winning X amount of awards? Is that being at the top whatever? What is it for you at this point?
ER: I have so many goals, I’m hitting them, and I’m trying to make more goals. I got approved to be in Hustler Taboo, also Playboy. My biggest goal is I want to be the first trans girl in Penthouse. It’s probably one of the most unattainable goals of mine, but I think it’ll happen sooner than later.
It’s kind of hard to be like, ‘Oh, I’m the biggest porn star because of this.’ But I hit all the awards this year that I would have won. So now I’m like, ‘What else can I do?’ And I think that’s why I’m going more mainstream. And Lainie, my publicist, has been amazing. She’s working me like a dog when I go to New York. I kind of just want to be like a household name. When people think of porn, they think of Angela White, anybody who’s a fan of porn knows her. And so, I think that anybody who’s a fan of porn, I want them to say: “Oh, fuck, Emma Rose.” She’s awesome. So I don’t know.
Sure, I think the awards are really nice, but I know so many other girls that are amazing performers that don’t have as many awards. So, I feel like I don’t put as much weight into those.
SW: Of all the accolades and stuff you’ve got up to this point, is there any one specific that blows your mind like, ‘How the hell did I get this or how did I meet this person to work with this person?”
ER: Oh, my God. I feel like I’m running through my mind on these. I feel like, with my AVN award, I wasn’t surprised because I worked really hard in twenty twenty-two. I cried at times because I was working so hard, but I wouldn’t give it up for the world.
Honestly, I feel the one that I didn’t expect to win was my Pornhub Award, because I’ve been trying to build my Pornhub brand and making it more popular because it’s Pornhub is hard. Anything that’s online like that is really hard. But this year, I want to do more camming. After October, I’m trying not to plan on going to LA. I’m trying to stay here and at least have a routine where I can go camming and live and doing Twitch and everything like that more.
SW: Can we talk more about Muses?
ER: It was directed by Bree Mills. I love her as a director. She’s one of my favorite female directors. There’s not many, but her vision is always fucking great. But Muses, I was able to pick everything that I wanted for my scene, like the style, the person I was working with. And so, I worked with April Olson on that one. I think I just was watching Bridgerton at that point. And I was like, ‘I want to be a queen and have, like a queen’s chamber.’ And it was beautiful. They had everything, the drapery and the queen’s bed. And April played kind of, I don’t know what the vibe is. But it was like a butch, very masculine, feminine, and I love that energy. And she drafted me. It was a beautiful scene. Bree had other girls like Errol Demir, Jada Venus, and so everybody was able to choose exactly what they wanted. I think that Chloe Kay had like a pink party, and then Jade was like a greaser, like a motorcycle girl. So, it was really cool to see how all the girls got to choose their fantasies and had them come to life.
SW: From the idea you had going into it to the finished product, how much of your, we’ll say, fantasy did they actually get on camera you know when it was edited.
ER: Oh, my God. They got a lot of it. plus, I worked with April before, so when I requested her, I said, “I just want her to take on, kind of like be the aggressor, the penetrator, I just wanted to be pretty.” Because a lot of times in trans girl-girl scenes, the girl is the one who takes it, the trans girl tops.
So flipping that in reverse was a sexy scene. I feel a lot of people don’t see trans girls getting strapped by girls. So, it was pretty cool. It was definitely a fantasy that’s checked off now.
SW: You’ve done multiple different types of projects. Do you have a preference between maybe a gonzo scene and a big budget feature?
ER: I do like the features. I love a movie. I love a storyline. I love the acting. My craziest gonzo scene was with Sergeant Miles, and I didn’t think they were going to release it. They released it two years afterwards. But oh my God. I like gonzo because it’s just like, hot sex. I really, really want to work for Vixen. I want to work for Deeper or any of those with the big, high-budget, beautiful scenes. Kaden Kross is one of my bucket list directors to work for. Her movies are always beautiful.
SW: For you right now, what is a good scene? Is it good energy, and passion? Is a good scene perfectly lit? Is a good scene what?
ER: I feel like a good scene is energy, there are some scenes that I’m like, I don’t know. They don’t look good on camera. I feel like some of them are just not the most popular. But it was just explosive sex. I have good chemistry with my scene partner because having no energy and no chemistry with your scene partner is like the worst.
I’m like, ‘I’m just the hole or I’m just a dick.’ But a good scene is one where I want to make my partner actually come, and I just want them to lose their mind. I feel like a lot of times when I’m getting fucked I become dick drunk and literally I’m slurring my words and my eyes rolling back in my head. It’s just passionate, hot fucking. That’s a good scene. There are other scenes that I’m like, ‘Oh, okay. It looks great on camera.’ And it’s stunning, but sometimes I feel like I didn’t put in the work that I wanted to. And I think a lot of times, like I was working with this guy, and I was holding on to his legs, and he throws my legs up. And it’s just so sexy and hot that when you have both of them, that’s an amazing scene.
SW: What type of sex do you like? Do you like fucking or do you like making love?
ER: Oh, Jesus. It depends on who it’s with.
I would say I love foreplay, honestly. I think that I don’t get enough of that in porn. That’s why in my personal life, I’m just like, suck my dick for like twenty minutes, then we can fuck. It’s definitely overlooked and rushed in the non-porn world. I think a lot of people don’t like foreplay, I’m just like, ‘Why?’ But I like sensual and then working its way up to just getting demolished. But I’ve been with so many people who like, just go on full energy. And I’m like, ‘Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Please chill. Calm down.’
SW: Do you like rough sex?
ER: I do. Not all the time, though. If I was dating somebody, I wouldn’t want rough sex all the time. I’ve already had that, and, I don’t know, I don’t like being pounded all the time. I would say maybe seventy percent of the time I went slow sex, and then thirty I want my lover to treat me like a whore in my personal life.
SW: Hair pulling is okay?
ER: Oh, yeah, of course.
SW: Dirty Talk?
ER: Yes. Oh, I love Dirty Talk. I actually have this storybook. It’s called Dipsea. And so it’s pretty much like audio smut books. I love talking dirty. If someone’s laying there like a mattress, I cannot do that. I need talking. It also helps me come. If it’s just like, I’m just trying to come and there’s no talking, I probably won’t.
SW: Do you have relationships with civilians?
ER: So, I haven’t dated anybody that’s not in the industry. I’ve only dated three people in my life. So, I think that if I were to date someone else in the industry, I think that my next significant other would be a woman. The guys are just, oh my God; I don’t know. I haven’t found anybody in the industry that I would date. But civilian-wise, I don’t know. I would give it a try. I think it would be nice if they were a cuck. If they were like, they want to hear about my day. They want to hear the stories. They want to see people. I would love a cuck and a boyfriend. That would be great.
SW: Do you think maybe you intimidate men or people?
ER: Oh, yeah. Yeah. I’m a lot of energy. I remember being scolded by my ex all the time for how rambunctious I am. But I’d always say, “I can’t help it. I’m just all over the place.”
SW: Well, we’ve kind of touched on it, but how much different are you than Emma Rose, the character? Is there a difference personality-wise?
ER: No. It’s like the same person. It’s not even like an alter ego or anything. It’s just the same person. I’m super bubbly, just I love to talk. Sometimes I talk too much. But I would say they’re the same person. Emma Rose is way more patient than I am.
SW: Are you more comfortable at home, so maybe you get a little crazier?
ER: I think that throughout porn, I’ve just gotten way more adventurous. My go-to porn used to be POV anal, and now it’s like cucking and doming. I think that Emma Rose has created a little bit of a monster where it’s like I just like, I was never a Dom type. I was always very submissive, but now, I like being a dom.
SW: Have you done bondage, BDSM, and all that?
ER: Yeah. I’ve done it mostly in the last two years now. And I have some guys that see me for dom work, so that’s nice. I remember I got this one guy and I put clamps all over his chest, and the skin was pulled tight,then I got one hundred-and-fifty clothespins all over him, and there was like fifty on his dick. I’m just like, you do it where that has like the little piece of string, and then you rip it up, and it goes. So. it’s pretty fun.
SW: Tell me about your OnlyFans.
ER: So my OnlyFans, I’ve had it since two thousand nineteen. Honestly, I update it all day, every day. It’s like really, really busy. But my top fans, like my top twenty fans I’ve had for, I would say, over two years. But it has everything. It has my life. It has, of course, all of my porn. But I update it throughout my day. How I try to structure everything is if I post my stories online, everything matches up when I post it that day. So, if I’m posting something on Instagram, you’ll see the outfit that I’m naked in on my OnlyFans. I like to keep them all, everything updated all at the same time. But I’m very, very active on my OnlyFans.
SW: You do custom work to?
ER: I do a lot of customs. Sometimes I turn my customs off where I’m just like, ‘Hey, I’m not doing them right now,’ because I can get bombarded very quickly. I have my tonsil surgery on Tuesday, so I think I have like thirty more customs to do. And so, I probably do on average maybe thirty to forty customs a month. It’s great though. And I never sell them. I never resell them. I say their name throughout the whole entire thing. So, it’s specifically for them, and I make it very special.
SW: What’s the craziest request you got for a custom.
ER: Oh my God. Honestly, there’s a lot. I think the craziest thing is the guy who wanted to see me fart over and over again. And to me, I’ve never heard a guy want that. I’ve heard they like belching and eating and stuff like that. But that one was kind of like, oh. Probably one of my craziest ones was a guy wanted me to talk in detail about my orchiectomy, about my castration, and pretty much how it felt, and then also sisify him afterwards. Like, ‘Oh, your ball’s tucked off. You’re nothing but a hole. You’re just nothing.’ And it was just really interesting to hear. He’s like, “I just want to know what they did surgery-wise.” And so, I was like, “Okay. They cut over my balls, yada, yada, yada.” That was interesting.
SW: When you shoot actual content for your platforms, do you shoot stuff you want to shoot or stuff you think will sell?
ER: Definitely both. I moved my best friend from Florida out here because he’s my videographer. So he does all my videos, all my editing. And so it’s just nice that we have our selected days where we say, “Okay. This is the way we’re going to do the customs. These ones, we’re going to do solos. This day, we’re going to do yadda yadda yadda outside work or something.” So, I do have a revolving list that people constantly send in. I’m like, ‘I want ideas like, what y’all want?’ But a lot of them is where I’m like what I like to do. Even in my live shows, sometimes people get bossy. I have to say, “I’m the captain of this ship. Shut the fuck up.” So, it’s nice.
SW: Speaking of sexual acts, is there one specific act they like to see you do more than others when it comes to customs.
ER: I definitely do a lot of humiliation for my customs.. I feel like I also have a sissy club that I’m creating, and then I have a foot club. But right now, I’m creating a manual for specifics, where I want them, like my sissy fans, the ones who like cooking or a cage chastity, I’m giving them homework to do. And so, as they do the homework, they complete these levels. I’m pretty much making like a sissy school, which is pretty cool.
SW: Prior to getting into adult, had you watched adult material?
ER: A little bit. I wasn’t really much of a porn watcher. I like to read porn. I don’t know why. I just started listening to it, which I kind of like more because I listen to it when I drive. But when I first started mking porn, I watched a lot of porn because I was studying. I think that a lot of times people don’t do that. And so, I was watching a lot of different types, the energy and how to just, I don’t know. Now it comes naturally. But at first, I was like, ‘I don’t know what I’m doing.’ I was nervous. But I think just being able to be really flexible helps. My back is really flexible. I’ve had so many directors say “It’s nice that you can show everything and turn around and see the camera.”
SW: Do you like having sex in public?
ER: Yeah. I think that just outside is nice. I grew up on a farm, so I just love being outside. I love hiking. One time I went hiking in Vegas, and we were at this waterfall, because it was at the end of winter. I’m sucking his dick. And he didn’t tell me the whole time that there’s a guy on the mountain. I saw him climbing, and I thought he went on the other side. And no, he was coming down. So he comes in my mouth. And my titties are out. I’m like jacking off. So as I’m like cleaning up, I turn around, and I just see the guy just giggling. And I’m just like, ‘Jesus.’ I came already, and said “I’m already fucking ready to fuck again.” I love being watched, I don’t really like the fear of almost being caught. I like the thrill of being caught, if that makes sense.
SW: So the rush is for you that people are watching, and you might get caught? But if you get caught by, I don’t know, somebody, do you want them to not tell anybody? Are you going to convince them not to tell anybody?
ER: I don’t know what I’m going to tell them, depending on, they can join, possibly, depending if they’re hot.
SW: Are you from Vegas originally or from somewhere else?
ER: I’m from Central Florida. I grew up had cattle, goats and everything, ten-and-a-half acres where I grew up. At first, I hated it, and now I’m like, ‘Damn, that would actually be really nice to have again.’
SW: Did you go to a public school, private school?
ER: I went to a public school. It was in the middle of an Orange Grove. But instead of the school I was zoned for, I had to go to another school in the next city, which was a nightmare.
SW: In grade school, did you have a favorite subject?
ER: Probably science. That’s why I thought when I started college, I went for biomedical because I was like, ‘I’m going to be a surgeon.’ I failed chemistry twice in a row though. I’m was like, ‘Fuck this. I’m never doing this ever again.’ And then I switched to marketing. But my favorite was science.
SW: While you were in grade school, did you have any idea what you want to do with the rest of your life?
ER: Not really. My mom, when I was a kid, was a crime scene technician. So, at first, I was like, ‘I’m going to work in forensics.’ And then I got used to dead people. It was fine at first but then I got turned off. Then I was looking at things that I wanted, I think I wanted to be a meteorologist. And in college, I just wanted to work in sales, mostly, after, I started marketing.
SW: In high school, were you a popular girl? Were you a loner? Were you a geek? Were you a nerd?
ER: I was popular. I made my rounds through every year, like the people who I hung out with. My first year, I was in agriculture, and it’s way more country. My second year, I was hanging out with the emo kids. And then junior year, I was hanging out with more of the preppy girls. And then Color Guard. Then senior year, I was focusing on making my good grades and hanging out with the smart people.
SW: Were you ever bullied in grade school or high school?
ER: I was bullied in elementary school, maybe. And then partly in middle school. And then after that, I became a bitch and I was the bully, which is not good. But I remember I was waiting on the bus and all of a sudden, I’m standing there. And then the next moment, I’m falling towards the ground because someone picked me up and threw me. That was the moment, my turning point that I was like, ‘I’m not going to get bullied anymore. I’m going to be young, mean and gay.’ But after that, middle school, high school, there was no bullying.
SW: Did you go to your prom in the whole bit in high school?
ER: Oh, I did. Yeah. I went to prom. That was cute. I was trying to figure out what the theme was. I went with my friend. It was a girl moment, but it was cute. Except I didn’t drink or anything. I guess I wasn’t that crazy in high school.
SW: Had you done any modeling or anything at that point?
SW: No, not really. I was modeling a little bit before my transition, then I transitioned at twenty-one. And there was a moment where I kind of, just because it wasn’t really possible, and then also after I had my castration, I gained a lot of weight very suddenly. I gained like twenty five pounds. And so, I was like just uncomfortable in front of the camera.
SW: You mentioned you transitioned at twenty-one. How does that come up? I mean, is that something you thought about for a while?
ER: So when I was a kid, I just thought that it was normal for gay boys to think of themselves as women when they’re older because I never met anybody who was trans until I was nineteen. I think at that moment, I was like, ‘Oh, my God. Everything’s starting to make sense.’ I remember I told my grandpa. “Oh, I just felt like I was wired wrong when I was a kid.” And then I always saw myself as, like a businesswoman or a wife or I just thought it was normal. And then growing up, I was like, ‘Oh, okay. This is not normal.’ So, it was kind of, well, I was an angry teenager. I was very angry all the time, and I didn’t know why. And then I was like, ‘Oh, okay. This makes way more sense now.’ So, after I met, her name was Aubrey Nicole, at nineteen, that was when I started doing drag and kind of like exploring that side. I was performing. And at night, I would go out as a girl. Plus, I was twenty. So that was when I was thinking that maybe I should go to therapy. And so my therapist was a trans man. Oh my God, he made me do so much work on myself and really dive deep. He made me work through a lot of my trauma as a kid. It was nice because I think that’s why I’m so self-aware and critical of everything, in a good way. Healthy criticism, I just don’t take anything at face value. He really helped me. And then I started hormones at twenty-one. SW: Your friends growing up, were they aware of this side of you? Were they surprised by it?
ER: Not really. At the moment when I transitioned I was wearing makeup as a boy. So, it kind of just happened naturally. But growing up, I think there was one time I dressed up in a skirt and everything. I went to school, but it was more of, like a joke. And then I was pretty, I was feminine, but at the same time, I was like, masculine and wore, wranglers and cowboy boots growing up because I pretty much just wanted to be a man because of my dad.
SW: Was there a specific thing that led you to say “Okay, I’m doing this now.”
ER: Yeah. It was because I started steroids. I started steroids around nineteen, twenty, and I was growing more hair and getting bulkier. I thought it was because I was becoming really unhappy with my body. So, I thought steroids are the answer. I was getting even worse, more depressed, and I’m like, ‘Something is wrong. Maybe I’m going the wrong way.’ I think that was the final push that I needed. I saw myself getting more masculine, and I was like, ‘This is not what I want.’ So that was when I really went to therapy.
SW: The process for you, was it harder psychologically or physically?
ER: I actually had my castration four months in. You should never do that. The testosterone crash from that was so intense. I would never wish that on anybody. I’m happy that, at least for my journey, that all the bad shit happened at the beginning because you’re relearning everything. You’re learning how to navigate as a woman in the world. You’re navigating body dysphoria, and then also making sure that your hormones are right. And then after that, I know so many people ask me like, “Oh, are you going to get your pussy done?”
At first, I was looking into getting SRS, but then I came to the conclusion. ‘Every time I want SRS is because I’m being rejected by somebody because I have a dick.’ And so it wasn’t until I feel like I really fell in love with myself after I started porn because stripping was fun. But porn, I feel like I really met people who loved me for me, no matter if I had a pus or dick or whatever. It’s kind of like I found myself after porn.
SW: I have read several variations about the castration, can you tell us what really happened?
ER: What happened was, I went to this doctor in Detroit, and he did my ex-friend at the time. She had her balls removed, and so I was having really bad pain from my androgen blockers, my testosterone blockers. I’m laying there. And he goes in with a needle in each testicle and lidocaine, big needle. And it was so painful. But it numbs you. And I’m laying there and you’re awake. And he’s like, “Do you feel that?” And I’m like, “Feel what?” He’s like, “Oh, I’m just cutting you open.” So I don’t know why. I look down because there’s no cover.
And I’m just like, ‘It looks like cherry pie.’ I was trying not to heave. I asked him. “Oh my God, can I keep them?” I don’t know why I wanted to keep them. He was like, ‘What the fuck? You’re not going to keep them in a jar!’ So gross, he’s like, “Yeah. Just don’t tell anybody because I can lose my license.” So I’ve never said his name. But I was back at the hotel, and I’m like so much pain. I’m coming to the realization that I can’t carry this on a plane because I just have a carry-on. I can’t check them.’ So, if you come in with a body part, they’re going to be like, “Call the police.” So, I remember walking in so much pain and my friend’s taking a bath. And I just chunk them at her in the tub, and it falls right there on the rim of the tub, and she starts screaming, “You nasty bitch, you nasty bitch,” and dying laughing. At that point, she took it with the tissue and threw it in the toilet, and I put the other one in the toilet. We flushed it. Oh, God. I had big balls too.
SW: I think you mentioned it, but do you finally become comfortable in yourself in adult, or does adult just make you more comfortable?
ER: I was always really confident. I’ve always been a talker. I’ve always just loved being in front of the camera. I think that porn definitely pulled me way out, way more just because you’re naked around all these people. And there’s nothing more vulnerable than being naked in front of a camera. You know what I mean? You can’t hide anything. But I think that porn definitely helped me with my confidence and being comfortable. Also like ninety-five percent of my friends are civilians. So, it’s interesting talking to them about work, and they don’t really know what goes on with porn and stuff like that. I tell them so many things with my stories. It’s just crazy seeing the divide of people who are not in porn. They think that things are taboo when it’s like people in porn are like, ‘Oh, that’s a normal Monday.’ Oh, I know so much more than you want to know. You have no idea.
SW: So then do you do OnlyFans before you get into porn, or do you do OnlyFans and then get into porn?
ER: I started porn in twenty twenty. I had three scenes, I think, before COVID. And then I was like, ‘Let me move to Vegas.’ And so I’ve been shooting regularly since July of twenty twenty. But I started my OnlyFans in July of twenty nineteen because I was traveling. That was after I had that issue where, I don’t know if you heard this story, but I was at a strip club and I was in stealth mode. So, I get everything taped. Like nobody knew and my tape pops. And that was the moment when I was like, ‘Maybe I shouldn’t dance at these places and get my ass beat.’ So that was the beginning of OnlyFans. And it took off really well at the beginning. I didn’t know what I was doing, but it was nice that I was able to get fans, and that’s when I also made it with Twitter.
SW: How do you get into stripping?
ER: I started stripping in college to pay for my college bills. Oh my God, I was nineteen, had just broke up with my ex. I had my first ex, we were together for two years. And summer was coming, and knew I had to move out of the dorms. I had no money. I was broke. I didn’t know what to do. So I thought ‘Just be a go-go boy.’ And so I was a go-go dancer, and then that turned into stripping because when I lived in Fort Lauderdale, they had a gay strip club. So, I kind of just went from go-go to that. That was great. That summer was like a movie. But after that, I started dancing again for the Male Reviews in Tampa. And then it was nice that I found some sugar daddies on the way.
SW: Once again, was stripping strictly for the money or would you like the attention? ER: Oh, both. I think that it was amazing. One time, I was upside down, and I will never forget this. I’m upside down, dancing on the pole. Money’s falling, and I do this trick, and every guy’s face in there is just like in shock. They’re just like, and I love that. I don’t know. It fed my ego. And the money was good. So, I can’t deny that.
SW: Were you doing lap dances and everything?
ER: Yeah, I was doing lap dances too.
SW: Did you like doing them?
ER: I liked lap dances, but dancing on stage was one of my favorites. I think one of my least favorites, even though I love talking, I just hated talking to men in a strip club because it’s so loud, and you can barely hear, and it’s just like persuading them to get a dance. Also on stage, it’s just, I don’t know; give me a stage and I’m a happy girl. SW: Did you do full nude clubs? Did you just do topless clubs?
ER: I only did fully nude for the Trans Club. There was one in Tampa. It was Skin. Now it’s called Players Club. I think they’re only open on Sundays and Mondays for trans. And I would always have really cool outfits and change my outfit throughout the night.
A lot of the trans clubs are kind of why I started working at the straight cis female clubs is because there’s more money and they’re cleaner. Some of the trans clubs are a little seedy.
SW: Stripping, for you, is it a sense of power too when you’re on stage? You’re always elevated slightly, and the guys are beneath you, and you’ve got a pole, and you can bend your body.
ER: I don’t even think it was about the power. I love putting on a show because there’s times when I was dancing and I mean, there is a girl dancing on stage, but I’m dancing on the floor, I don’t know. I just like putting on a show. The guys always loved it.
SW: How do you make the transition then from stripping to someone who’s got an OnlyFans account? How does that happen?
ER: Christian XXX was the first person I ever shot with for porn. And he was bugging me for like a year, saying “Oh, I want to see you. I want to shoot you.” But I was saying “No. I don’t want to ruin my life with porn.” And he kept on trying to lowball me. And so, I remember I was in Miami, and I was drunk. And I was saying, “You know what? I could be a badass bitch.” And those are like the exact words that were in my head, and I messaged him, and I said “All right. We can do the scene.” And so we shot, I think, January 3rd, and that was like my first porno, and I think it was also the same time that AVNs was happening, but I didn’t even know what AVN was at that point. I had never heard of it, until I shot my first scene. And then after that one got released, all the companies like Evil Angel and Grooby, they were saying to me “I want to shoot you. I want to shoot you.” So, it was kind of cool, though, but how fast they reached out so fast that kind of made me nervous.
I was thinking that I didn’t know anybody and worry if I was even going to be popular. But it turned out to be fun. And then when I started porn, I didn’t have my face done. I didn’t have my titties done. I didn’t have my body done. It was before any surgery. So, it was kind of cool.
SW: All that stuff you just mentioned, were those business decisions to do all that stuff, or were they just stuff you wanted to do?
ER: I definitely want to get my face done.
At first, I was like, ‘I don’t want to get my tits done.’ And then, I don’t know. I love them. I love them now. I think that I just look so good. I think also I just look so good on camera. So being curvy, it’s nice. But I didn’t feel pressure to do it. I didn’t feel any less sexy before because so many of my fans are just like, ‘I miss your small titties.’ And sometimes I do too. But I like having titties. My face was a big concern for me because what I wanted was I just wanted to be able to not have to wear makeup and have my face still very soft like before, but I feel like it looked a little bit more harsher. Now I rarely wear makeup if I’m not working.
SW: Do you remember the first time you saw production skills, professional nudes of yourself? Were you surprised? Were you shocked?
ER: I did professional shots, nude ones even before my transition. I was just so nervous because I was thinking, “This is my naked body for everybody in the world to see.” So, it kind of took some getting used to, but it was thrilling, I was nervous. And I usually don’t get nervous a lot like that.
And then my Grooby pictures came out. I think my very first scene that went very popular was my transfer student scene, in Paris. It was me and Draven Navarro, so many people actually say they found me through that scene. It was just awesome. SW: When you did your first scene, was it harder doing, the dialogue or the actual sex?
E: The actual sex because I never had opened up like that to a camera before. The dialogue, I remember my words pretty easily. Now it all comes like second nature. But it was definitely the sex. I remember my first big production was with the Evil Angel shot by Joey Silvera and my scene partner was Dante Cole. I really felt like I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. I was like, ‘Okay. Well, you’re going to have to have to do it.’ I was so nervous because I knew Dante through his work. I watched his porn before. So meeting a guy for the first time, someone who I’d watched his porn for like years, I’m just like, ‘Oh, this is like crazy. I’m here.’
SW: You mentioned you got nervous sometimes. Was that nervous from working with somebody like maybe Dante? Was that nervous being on a big set?
ER: The person. I feel like, on a big set, I don’t really get that nervous. I like a busy set too because I know it’s fun. I know one time I was sitting on the floor and I’m shaking my dick and everybody’s off of the floor. They’re trying to move lights and stuff because I always make jokes with the crew. But it was with Dante, shooting with him made me nervous. Angela, too, oh my God, my heart was pounding, I was thinking ‘I need to make sure my dick is hard.’ I was so nervous because I don’t use Trivex. I don’t use the injection. I had a really bad experience. So you have to go inside that mind space to stay hard.
SW: Do you smoke a joint or do something and make yourself more comfortable, or how do you balance yourself out?
ER: I’ve smoked a couple of times before set, but I don’t really like getting high because then I’m just way too, I just know all the lights and all the cameras, and I’m like, ‘Okay, now I’m too stoned.’ So I don’t know.
SW: And when you’re shooting the actual scene, are you more into trying to get yourself off and fucking have the time of your life, or are you more worried about giving the camera what it needs?
ER: I think it depends. At the end, for sure, I’m like trying to nut. Sometimes directors say “You don’t have to come in the scene because the guy does.” And I’m like, ‘I want to come.’ I’m horny and I don’t get blue balls, but still, I’m like, I need a bust. So, at the beginning, there are some movements where, again, flexibility comes into play, and sometimes directors are saying, “Oh, this shot is just so good.” So, I try to do a bit of both, especially with my female senior partners. I love to squirt, and I just love making a girl come.
Dem Sutra is amazing at squirting. I remember during our scene, I was like, ‘Oh, my God. This is great.’
SW: Have you done anything sexually that you maybe surprised yourself or shocked yourself?
ER: I think that there’s been times when I have been just so tired because it’s a strenuous scene and it’s hot. And so I am shocked at myself sometimes that I am able to perform, and it looks great. There was one point I remember I had taken Viagra, but I didn’t eat, and it was such a long day. I thought I was going to pass out. And I’m working through it. It’s fucking hot. It’s outside. I’m just dying. But it was beautiful. It was a beautiful scene. I think that’s the times when I really surprised myself was pushing through and also for not being a bitch on set.
SW: When you’re shooting a scene too, for sake of this discussion, we’ll pretend you don’t know the person. Can you kind of get a vibe as the scene goes along like, “This is going to be really fucking cool.”
ER: Oh, yeah, for sure. I remember my first time with Emma Magnolia, and Moraine, the director was like, “Hey,” because a lot of the stuff was coming out online about people not wanting to fuck off camera, they were like. “Please agree now. Just don’t fuck off camera.” We talked a couple of times before, but I didn’t really know her like that. We’re just like eye-fucking each other. I’m like, “Lord, you know it’s going to be so good.” Finally, work time and fuck, it’s just explosive sex, so good. She strapped me. I fucked her. We tag team September {Reign}. It was just great.
SW: When you’re in awe of somebody. Can you get an idea when you’re doing that?
ER: I’m kind of nervous, but I want to make this amazing.
SW: How do you get through that?
ER: I tell them. I’m like, “I’m nervous.” And usually, if you tell them you’re nervous, instead of just trying to fake it till you make it, it’s way more easier to work around your nervousness because I remember with Angela. With Angela, I told her. I was like, “I’m so nervous right now.” And she’s like, “Don’t be”, my hands are shaking as I’m eating her pussy.” I think now I’m way less nervous with my senior partners, even the new ones. I’m working with some big names coming up soon, which I’m really excited for, I doubt that I’ll be so nervous at that point. But yeah, just don’t get stuck in your head. Oh, my God. Stop it.
SW: After you worked with Angela, and then you see the material after. Does it bring back the memories of your shooting? anything specific?
ER: I just feel like her energy is, just so, every time I think about porn in general, I think of Angela just because she’s given me so much advice. Angela and Phoenix Marie are like the first people that if I have a question that’s porn-related, I’ll ask them. And they’re kind of like really good mentors. If it’s mostly trans-related, I’ll ask Domino Presley. But yeah, they’re definitely, I would say my mentors in porn.
SW: We’ve been talking about sex. Were you sexual before you transitioned?
ER: Yes, I’ve been horny as long as I remember.
SW: Were you in high school when you lost your virginity? Did that happen before?
ER: That happened very, I think, yeah, that happened pretty early. High school-ish. Actually, I think it was before high school. But I fucked a lot throughout college. I fucked a lot through high school. I fucked a lot through even my in-between stage, kind of like when I was insecure about my body, at the beginning of my transition, I was wearing a wig because my hair was so short and just before I got my hairline done. I don’t think that there’s been a month in my life that I haven’t had sex. Maybe after I had my surgery. But even then, that was probably only like six weeks.
SW: The sex back then, were you more on the prowl? Were you looking for a relationship or just having sex?
SW: I was at the bottom. I was a full bottom. Like I never topped, which is kind of interesting, but I top so much now. No, it was definitely like, I don’t know. I was more of a reckless hoe back then. I think now I’m very responsible because you don’t know what people have. But no, back then, I was definitely a little reckless.
SW: Do you stay in touch with people you knew before you transitioned, or is that like just a different part of your life?
ER: No, I knew so many people before my transition. My two best friends. She knew me when I was 18, because we went to college together. And so a lot of people do know. Yeah, I’m trying to think, everybody from Florida that I’m in touch with, they knew me before.
SW: Are they surprised?
ER: Are they. Oh my God. Everybody’s like, rooting in me on. They’re just like, “I see that you’re getting so popular.” You’re like, “Awesome.” Because they’ve seen the growth. They’ve seen me at Rock Bottom. So they’ve seen everything. So it’s been great. It’s kind of like, from where I came from to where I am now, it’s a huge, huge leap.
SW: Have any people from your past hit you up on social media, or brag that they banged a famous porn star before she was famous?
ER: Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people do.
SW: Did they actually bang you?
ER: No, there are some that are just like, “Oh, I’ve seen in the comments too. People are just like, “Oh, my God, I fucked her.” A lot of guys and girls actually from high school and from a past that I’m not in touch with, They’re just like, “Hey, I just stumbled upon your porn.” And it’s like, “Great.” And I’m like, “All right.
SW: With all these discussions in public about whether teenagers should be able to consider transitioning. Do you agree, disagree? Is that too young of an age?
ER: I get this question. Okay. So I think that, overall, parents should be able to support their children. But he’s acting like that, because he’s not getting attention. I don’t think that surgery and hormones are the answer for a teenager. But at the same time, I do think that it should be easier to get surgery as soon as you can, like at 18. But there’s so many development stages at that moment that it’s kind of like, it’s a case-by-case. It’s not a one-size-fits-all, but I think that exploring through clothes and makeup and a positive environment is super important for a teenager to start transitioning. But then again, like the US versus all these other countries that have trans individuals, they’re treated so differently, like in New Zealand and Australia. They have a very thorough vetting process for trans kids through psychiatrists and through therapy and everything that sometimes, it’s kind of rushed in America, and it’s kind of like, a commodity now. So I feel like, me as a teen versus teens now, oh my God, it’s so different. There’s so much noise. There’s so much chatter and influence online. It’s kind of hard to say.
SW: You meet a 10-year younger version of yourself, and she either wants to get in the business or transition. What do you tell her? ER: Oh, my goodness. You are not ready for this life. I would say just go harder, honestly. I think that there’s been times when I waited on a decision and when I should have just did it, and just went with my gut because sometimes I have all these voices in my head from people saying, “You should have and critiquing or giving me advice.” And just go with your gut because my gut has never steered me wrong.
SW: Anything you want to say to all of your fans?
ER: Oh, my God. I love all of my fans so much. I cannot be where I am without them today. And I just love that they like me for me. All of my goofy, even my sad moments because there’s been times that I cry out to my only fans online because I’m just in a mood. And my fans are always there. My OGs, my day ones, no matter what I do, they’re just always there and support for me. And I love them all.
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Thank you Emma, special thanks to Lainie for her help with this
Ralph Greco, Jr. is the devilishly clever nom de plume of professional writer/musician Ralph Greco who lives in the wilds of suburban New Jersey. He is also a podcast co-host, but as everyone has a podcast these days, this fact is of very little consequence.
Ralph can be reached by writing [email protected]
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